[Desi Masala] MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE
MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE
Obviously written by some male chauvinist - hope you can 'handle it'?!
MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE
NICKNAMES If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each
other Laura, Kate and Sarah. If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will
affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla and Four-eyes.
EATING OUT When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in
$20, even though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything
smaller and none will actually admit they want change back. When the girls
get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.
MONEY A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs. A woman will pay $1 for a
$2 item that she doesn't need but it's on sale.
BATHROOMS A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste,
shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel . The average number of
items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to
identify more than 20 of these items.
ARGUMENTS A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says
after that is the beginning of a new argument.
FUTURE A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man
never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
SUCCESS A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can
spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
MARRIAGE A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.
DRESSING UP A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty
the trash, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail. A man will dress
up for weddings and funerals.
NATURAL Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed. Women somehow
deteriorate during the night.
OFFSPRING Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows
about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods,
secret fears and hopes and dreams. A man is vaguely aware of some short
people living in the house.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
A married man should forget his mistakes. There's no use in two people
remembering the same thing!
SO, send this to the women who have a sense of humor and who can handle it
...and to the men who will enjoy reading it.
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